Our Family: Tiffany and Carla

April 20, 2011 | ELIXHER 1

Our Family is a series that celebrates two-mommy families and delves into some of the challenges they face. The goal of the series is to depict same-sex parent families in a way that’s authentic and dispels myths associated with same-sex childrearing. Today we catch up with Tiffany, a 31-year-old small business owner, her partner Carla, a 30-year-old social services worker, and their four children: Darren, Aisha, Erica and Jermaine.*

ELIXHER: Tell us a bit about your family.
TIFFANY: We have four children, all biological. My partner has three girls and I have one boy from previous heterosexual relationships. We live outside of DC in Northern Virginia.

Darren, 9, is the lone boy! He’s very diplomatic, but he also thinks he knows everything and will debate a point until the end. He is very confident, right or wrong. He, like most boys, loves video games, plays football and basketball. He’s also an honor roll student. He’s also very forgetful. It’s typical for him to misplace something. He lost a quarter from the door of the house to the car and again from the car to school one time. But this is typical Darren! [Laughs.]

Aisha, the oldest girl, is 8. She is our little fashionista and chatterbox. I swear she’s the next Oprah or Donna Karan. She loves all things girly and is a Girl Scout. She has an incredible eye for design and makes clothes for her dolls. I mean stuff that we would want to wear. She loves people and being around people and talking to people. She’s extremely extroverted.

Erica is 5 and is very strong-willed. She just started Kindergarten and loves it. She was upset because there was no school on the weekends! She is the only one of all four of the children who helps me in the kitchen. Albeit, she’s just “working” for a taste of whatever I’m making, but she’s always a big help and can be counted on to get stuff done. Unlike Darren, if I want something held on to, I can give it to Erica. If you give her something, trust, she will not lose it.

Then there’s Jermaine who is 4 and is the boss. She’s our little enforcer and helps keeps the other kids in line. She’s not afraid to get in someone’s face and tell them what they need to do. [Laughs.]

ELIXHER: It sounds like a lot of personalities under one roof! How long have you and your partner been together? And how/when did you know it was the “right” time blend families?
TIFFANY: We were together in high school, and she found me again after ten years apart. I’ve always loved her and so it was just “right.”

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